Sleep...

I haven't slept for about 42 hours, and yet I find myself wandering around my room, doing trivial things and unable to sleep.

It's not so much that I'm forcing myself to stay awake. I want to sleep. I want to relax. The problem lies with my stress levels, as well as my expectations of the life I'm living. There's so much that I love about it, but so much more that I want, that would make it whole. Looking at it from the outside, it's a small part, but I can see it as a big part. I want it. I'm ready for it, so now it's just a waiting game to see if I can receive it.

So, I continue to stay awake. Counting the hours and minutes as they go by, thinking and wondering with heavy lids and a light head.

Oh well, I suppose. If things happen, they happen. If sleep happens, it happens.